LESSONS OF JUDAISM

 

Spouses

†† When I was a kid my mother found green beans in my socks.I did not like vegetables and found ways to avoid eating them.I hid them in my socks, my napkin, my pockets, down my shirt, under my plate.Imagine my joy when we got a dog!Next to my chair was her favorite place to sit.As I got older I came to like vegetables and began to eat them readily because I wanted to.However, I will admit to still sneaking a bite to the dog now and then.

 

†† Religion can cause a separation between a Baal Teshuvah and his spouse. While one wants to grow and increase in mitzvoth the other wonít go along.Out of love and respect she will participate but only to a point. There is still a connection but they feel pain because they are going in separate ways.

 

†† Compounding this the Bal Teshuvah thinks, ďIím doing what G-d wants.I am on the side of RIGHT!ĒHe feels that the spouse MUST follow.He is doing the right thing and she is not.She is wrong.

 

†† If the religious path is right than G-d is certainly capable of working in the spouseís heart to bring her around without being forced. When the children are young a parent can train them in the way in which they should go1.However, the spouse is not a child, she is an adult. The Baal Teshuvah did not come because he was forced, he came because he got interested and came on his own.†††

 

††† G-d brought the couple together.He knew that one would become religious at a time when the other did not.It is wrong for one to consider that he married the wrong person and should have married a frum girl.If G-d had wanted him to marry frum, he would have been attracted to frum.This struggle is part of his growth and learning in Judaism.

 

†† She did not marry a religious Jew.If that was what she wanted she would have been attracted to a religious Jew.That is not what she asked for.The rules were changed on her.This is hard on her.

 

†† People avoid what is unpleasant and are attracted to what is pleasant.If the attitude and actions of the religious spouse are unpleasant and those are associated with Judaism than she will want to avoid Judaism. Nobody wants to be forced; it is unpleasant. It is a matter of attraction not forcing.Instead, by being appreciative of the things that are done, it makes Judaism something pleasant.

 

†† What attracted one spouse to G-d and Judaism may have nothing to do with what will attract the other.She may be attracted by something entirely different that is not important to the other.But to her it could be the key.

1. Proverbs 22:6

 

TOPICS

 

Growth

Equilibrium

Find a Good Teacher

Judaism, A Religion of New Beginnings

Knowledge and Wisdom

Never Give Up

Our Greatest Teacher

Progress

Slow and Steady Wins the Race

Truth; Our Most Powerful Tool

Value of Routine

Relationship: To G-d

Dishonoring Torah

Feeling Close to G-d

G-d Wants the Heart

Incomplete Offering

Time Spent

Whole and Willing

 

 

Prayer

Answers to Prayer

G-d Will Answer Your Prayers

Most Effective Prayer Offered

Purpose of Prayer

Why Prayer Services Arenít More Entertaining

Role of The Jewish People

(Purpose of Creation)

Eternal Life

Everything is Connected

G-dís Hidden Presence

Key to Success

My Part

Our Actions Change the World

Revealing the Concealed

Why the Animal Soul Controls the Body

 

 

Relationship: To Another Jew

Harbor No Enmity

Practicing Forgiveness

Spouses

Who Are your Victims?

The Soulís Mission

Just Right

Leaving a Mark on the World

Perfect Family

Perspective

Repair Your Part

 

 

Relationship: To Community

Charity Given With Joy

Love Every Jew

Mitzvah of Giving Up

Single Entity

Special Role of the Baal Teshuvah

Unity From Acceptance

Whole Story

Trust and Faith

Choices

Choosing for a Purpose

Donít Put G-d in a Box

Faith

Stick With G-d

 

 

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